Sources Reveal New Parks

- The Magic Kingdom
- Epcot
- Disney's Hollywood Studios
- Disney's Animal Kingdom
- Disney's Coaster Kingdom
- Disney's Lawnmower World
- Disney's Regretville
The new parks will be a way for Disney to fleece its visitors... You can pay $65 to enter, push a lawnmower at assigned locations throughout Disney property. If you pay teh premium of $85, you get a rider mower. Whatever the cost, you are paying to maintain the Disney property...
The second new park is a park filled with attractions and shows that they regret closing... 20,000 Leagues, Mister Toad and teh Original Journey into Imagination will be there surrounding a solid gold version of Horizons. As you leave the park you will get a signed apology by the Disney people who had the attraction removed. I hear from my sources that Michael Eisner is filling up his evenings and weekends with apology time!
You can count on these parks opening as my sources will always remain accurate and totally unaccountable to errors.
And all you rebels living in caves putting out your anachist newspapers.. You can't hide forever!


Vive la Doc T! (Comment this)
Like on Hoth?
Sweet! (Comment this)