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The dirt behind “Survivor: Passamaquoddy”
We in Passamaquoddy are always disgusted and judgmental of the members of the sleazy press who dig through garbage just for a news story. Especially with the eyes of the nation on us, we cannot afford to be seen as a negative force in the world. We will stand by our morals through thick and thin. So, even with the excitement of television crews in town to shoot a ‘reality’ show, we will not stoop to the level of the paparazzi.
With all that said, look what we found in the garbage can outside the Temporary Hotel… (where the contestants for the television show where staying at the time).
We’re not sure what it means.. Maybe it is some sorta code. We asked a handwriting expert for his opinion and he informed us we should get a life because this was written by a computer. We believe from his snippy tone, he may be behind the whole thing..
We’ll keep you informed!
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I’m ready for this. Look out Team Piranha!
And the Capulets said.”nana nana na na” Oh wait that’s the wrong skit. Go Team Sashimi!
I will be more then happy to send you my action items once my publicist finishes composing them.
“Good evening and welcome to the SLZ 6:27 news. I’m Ann Chor.”
“This just in… Congress may authorize an investigation into the actions of the host in the newest, and perhaps, strangest game of Survivor (if we make enough of a stink about it). It seems that several members of Congress should be quite concerned about this ‘Doc Terminus’ and his potential connections to ‘Darth Tyrannus’. This stems from a letter supposedly discovered by Mr. Terminus that he claims indicates shenanigans on the part of one or more players in the game.”
“SLZ News, however, has obtained a copy of this letter, and in our inexpert opinion (mostly that of the marketing staff who think this might be the best angle to increase our ratings, uhh – did I say that out loud?), we think this is the work of Mr. Terminus himself in a despicable effort to increase the ratings of this new show. We here at SLZ News would never admit to stooping to that level.”
“We can only hope that the members of teams Shashimi and Piranha will be wary of the supposed ‘host’ of Survior Pass-ama.. umm. Pasma… Quiddy, er, Passama… Quality, uhh, Thingy.”